


Roses for my Valentine

by sleepismybae



Category: - - Fandom
Genre: Bisexuality, Cheating, Edge - Freeform, Fights, Hate, Heartache, Heartbreak, Jealousy, Love, Lust, Multi, Pain, Shock
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 12:16:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7617775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepismybae/pseuds/sleepismybae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roses</p><p>                                                                            The smell of roses</p><p>                                                                          Lingering on her skin</p><p>                                                                             Making her smile</p><p>                                                                             Filling my senses</p><p>                                                                           Her favorite flowers</p>
            </blockquote>





	Roses for my Valentine

 

  
Her cold hand still in mine

I cannot believe this

Her breathing is now steady, but my heart pounds in my chest

Heart ache I can feel

Her eyes closed

Her presence lying unconscious before me

How did we come to this?

It is all my fault

I'm the only one to blame

If it wasn't for me she would have never been in this position

My grip tightens around her weak hand

My fingers intertwined with hers

I open my mouth, but no words come out

I need to apologise to her

When she wakes up she will hate me

She will hate me and I'll never get the chance to apologise

She deserves this

She deserves an explanation

She deserves a better life

Away from me

I'm the reason behind her sadness

She can be happy again

Without me

And that's all that matters

"C-Cara."I trail off

I can't seem to find the right words or compose a coherent sentence

So I say the first few words that come to my mind instead

"I love you."My eyes tearing up, threatening to spill the hot tears down my earlier abused cheeks

The lump that is growing in my throat is an unwelcoming feeling

It is now hard to swallow, but even harder to breathe

"I love you."I repeat these three holy but so sinful words once again

"I love you more than anyone could ever imagine. More than you can.More than your parents or your friends can.More than _I_ myself can."

"I love you more than the world could ever know and that's my fault. "

"I didn't appreciate you enough. "

"I didn't pay enough attention to the little things."

"Things like dancing like when nobody's watching. Things like quoting your favourite book when no one understands what you're talking about and you don't care."

"Things like stargazing when you should be sleeping and things like loving the smell of roses because they're your favourite flower."

"Those little things made me love you Cara."

" _You_ made me fall in love with you. "

"You have been the absolutely most precious gift in my life."

"Instead of taking care of you.Instead of loving you...I treated you bad.I broke you."My cheeks are now tear stained, but I couldn't care less

" _You_ deserve so much better than _me.You_ deserve the absolute best. "

"Anyone would be lucky to have you.Anyone would be lucky to have the privilege of waking up next to your beautiful face, with your blonde hair sprawled messily across your forehead. "

" _Anyone_ would be lucky to be loved by you."

"You're the most important thing in my life.You're the most priceless gem of all."

"You're my Cara and for me, it'll never change. "

"I'll never forget about you."

"I'll never forget a single second of the time I had with you. "

"But you... _You_ should forget about me."

"You shouldn't be with someone like myself. "

"I'm a monster and I don't deserve your love."

"You're too good for me Cara."

"And I really want to be selfish right now.Thinking that you love me back.Thinking you could forgive me.That you could stay with me because it feels right."

"But how could you love a selfish bastard like me?"Anger boils inside of me, burning my insides

"How could you even be with me in the first place?"

"Why were you so good with me?"

"I didn't deserve any of your special treatment. "

I'm raging and my heart beats faster than it should

What am I doing?

Am I blaming her for being with me?

Am I getting mad at her?

My beautiful girl

Once again she remains silent

She doesn't say a word

She couldn't

"Cara...I want you to know that my world revolves around you."

"Heck, you're _my whole world!_ "I say after calming myself down a bit

"And I'm so sorry I didn't let you know earlier. "

"I'm so sorry I was an asshole."

"I'm so, so deeply sorry that I wasn't enough for you."

"I'm sorry."I say as I let go of her hands

I'm not aware of whether she heard any of the things I had to tell her, but I had to get them of my chest

I had to let her know before it was too late

As I get up to leave her hospital bedroom I hear the now familiar beeping noise going off

**"No."**


End file.
